Welcome to my 1st blog. I've never been into this blogging thingy before, which i decided to embark on out of fun. And this is how I am gonna kickstart it.
In case you're wondering how come i chose Jedi; any member of the knightly order in Star Wars, which was trained to defend justice and peace in the universe(www.dictionary.com), its juz
simply because i have been an avid fan of it since young and started off when i saw the 1st Star Wars movie(dun noe how long ago it was).
...don't worry! Other than sometimes fantasizing about becoming a Jedi, I'm very normal otherwise. (just abit too normal)
Monday, May 23, 2016
Literally wasted my weekend on doing nothing but watching senseless videos. A whirlpool of thoughts were on my mind yesterday on the way back home after classes when I didn't realise that She was on the same train compartment as me. Don't really think she was aware that I was around since the train was kinda crowded and that she was with her bf.
Dun get me wrong abt why am I still writing abt such stuff. For me towards her I guess it's just left with indifference.... I really wouldn't have mentioned it if I didn't explained why I'm having this whirlpool of thoughts. I was actually thinking abt whether I should go over to the other side of the train to strike a convo with my classmate. Let's jus say she's someone I would to know more about. See the irony in fate here hahaaa
Well I think I have digress quite a fair bit as to what I really wanted to talk abt which is just really the whirlpool of thoughts. Having lived my life for so many years (I sounded like a sage here). A lot of times whenever I made any decision, my mind works something like a default program setting. Basically I would run through the scenario countless times abt what will be the eventual outcomes if I were to make certain choices. It's good to err on the side of caution people say. All the more important if the decisions you made have far reaching consequences. Or it's just simply a matter of thinking too much. It's true, I always tend to think and overthink too much that by the time I decided to make an action, the opportunity would have simply just gone. Just like what happens to case of deciding whether to strike a convo with my classmate. Due to awkwardness blah blah blah. Inaction; an unintended consequence of overthinking is often what happens eventually to me. Often I will just brush it off, attributing it to fate or that if its meant to be, it's meant to be. I was playing it too safe in love, in work and perhaps most if not all my decisions in life. And if you didn't realise, constantly having this whirlpool of thoughts in your head is actually mentally draining. People on the outside might think that in a normal meetup setting I seem overly quietly (I hope I dun give people the impression that I'm detached. That would be bad hahaa). But really the real reason I'm like that is due to the noises that's happening in my mind (I'm not delusional haha). Stop the noises in my mind
Sounds ironic, by playing it too safe I might have unknowingly missed out on many opportunities in life. Sometimes all I have to do is to have a little more faith in myself. Perhaps that will make me have a better ownership of my life :)
...the dark lord came, and left
