Friday, March 23, 2018
Engineering Change
Intention:
1) To get an in
principal agreement / awareness from RO/AO on career development for an
internal transfer within the company
2) To take
charge and plot my own career path (with plan and not just being trigger happy)
"Where do I
see myself in 3 years time?"
For a start, preferably
not in this department. Why you might then wonder........
Probably a more
appropriate question to ask might be
"Where do I
like to see myself in 3 years time"
Plateauing
skill set
I have been working
in the same job for the past 5 coming 6 years. True, I have transited to the
commercial side of the house fully only a year ago which is not really
considered long.
What I meant in
terms of skill set plateauing is that I have already learnt the ropes of what
it means to be an FTE. Of course one might argue that there can never be a
situation when u realise that you have learnt enough. How can I one say that he
has learnt enough about aircraft. I have worked/working on F16 -> F15 ->
A330 -> A320. Yes, one can never learn enough on the technical aspects of
aircraft knowledge, let alone 4 different aircraft type.... However, truthfully
speaking these technical aspects does not directly lie within the work scope of
being an FTE. But is this what I liked to learn more? More about that later.
Being a FTE, I was put into situations whereby I have learned how to cope with
a steep learning curve, how to work under stress, how to perform crisis
management, how to make snap quick decisions, how to rely on my group members
to work as a team, and perhaps more recently and importantly, how to manage
expectations. I have realised how hard it is to stay true to your morals and
values when it is so easy to stray away from your initial path in life. I have
seen how ugly things can get all in the name of meeting timelines. I
digressed.....
That being said,
perhaps the uncomfortable truth to the reason why I'm still here (I have often
ask myself this too!) is that I might actually be getting comfortable with what
I'm doing. I'm fully aware that the inertia to change gets harder the longer
one stays. Seeing all these movements (not sure whether is this by choice) of
people within this past year made me dread that the day may come that this will
happen to me too. By then I would already be too helpless to do anything about
it.
I'm someone who
is always a proponent of lifelong learning, especially so in the face of this
fast changing business environment. Hence skill set plateauing is something
that kindda irks me..... I guess this was one of the reason why I was
previously involved in a grassroots project on structuring learning development
for new employees within my unit (not just within my dept. unfortunately this interesting
side project sort of died off when my colleague got transferred .....)
Contribution
to the dept (the sandwich class)
I would define
myself as part of the sandwich class. People who are not exactly the lowest
life form in the company but yet not amongst the big fishes. We are expected to
start contributing to the dept after the years of 'investments' by the dept in
us when we were the lowest life form. Not trying to rebut here but in a bigger
perspective of things, what's the difference if I were to contribute what the
dept have 'invested' in me in a different role within the company? That being
said, I would like to believe that the dept should be pretty happy from the ROI
that they have already gotten out of me...
How to make sure
that there is a cover up in the event I left? I guess this was the same question
asked when I transited from fighters to commercial. Do we have enough
experienced commercial FTEs to cover my current work. Yes actually. There is no
anticipated overlap of test activities between the upcoming commercial
programs........
"Where
to I like to see myself in then?"
Marketing,
Program Management. I will always have a soft spot for aviation I admit but the
recent trend towards smart city concept, big data also offers enticing growth
opportunities to ride on. I wish to further work on in developing the big
picture perspective of how things are run at a macro level and the potential
head and tailwinds facing a business.
Final
Thoughts
I get that often
transfer opportunities are put forth to someone if you are:
1) A scholar
2) Rubbed enough
shoulder with more senior management to be 'noticed'
Obviously I belong
to non of the above or am currently not 'noticed' enough.
I see this
activity also as a way to get 'noticed' about my intentions such that even if
this activity does not work out, I'm still kept under the radar in the event
similar positions do open up in the near future.....
"You will
not be stopped if there are such opportunities open." Although they are
not actually privy to me, I would like to rewrite the stars and see how far
that takes me.....
...the dark lord came, and left
Thursday, March 22, 2018
Have been following the videos of few chinese malaysian youtubers recently. It dawn onto me that why do they seem so energetic and bright on screen even though they keep on mentioning that they always put in ungodly hours into their craft. Being a dancer myself, I can fully understand the hard work that goes in behind the scenes that are often not privy to the eyes of the audience often all just for the few minutes of fame in front of the screen. I dare say it takes more than just passion to be able to keep on doing what you are doing. They did pointed out that it was their love to create their own content that made that continue what they are doing till now. Money, fame was never their motivation (well of course I would think that they are fairly popular now..)
I often find that in Singapore (maybe its just me feeling this way), the first thing people ask about their job is typically what their remuneration is to the point i feel that money seem to be the only metric that sets your job apart from others..... Growing up in a not very well to do family to now drawing a middle class salary (I guess since I'm still single), money is important. But to me its only important to the point when you are able to meet your basic needs (food, accommodation etc) and some indulgence that I do every now and then (travels etc). I have to say that I'm one that do not really have any indulgence in the first place although I do like to get a flat soon and car (hmmmm). Job satisfaction is something I value a lot and yea I have been finding that I'm actually dragging myself for quite a long while now and yet I'm stumped why am I still where I am now. Procrastination, lazy, comfortable, you name it. I'm not really finding any excuse for myself for that....... It's so easy to fall through the cracks and be happy and comfortable with where you you are at. Watching the videos made me realise what makes one charming/sparkle is when you see someone putting their heart and soul into doing something which they believe in. I know that deep down, I have already long lost what initial spark that I have went I first started out.
Sometimes I really wished to go back to the days when I have so much drive and grit towards what I want to achieve in my career and the sense of camaraderie from my now ex colleagues that started out with me. The OTs spent were just so much more bearable because all these were spent with your....
Anyway Tong Tong, kudos for the hard work you have put in. I clearly enjoyed your videos. Not to mention you are my cai too haha....... From a silent SG supporter.
...the dark lord came, and left
Sunday, March 18, 2018
Its been a long time since I did a hike in SG. Did just that on friday for the treetop walk. Probably because all my previous recent hikes were done overseas (Snezka; highest mountain in Czech republic, Hells Valley; Germany), the walk seems rather mild in comparison. Not even tiring as I had thought it to be.......
Often, I find that my thoughts are nothing more than just imaginary barriers that I have set myself. Barriers from what i wondered? From failure, from hurt, from the unknown, from possibilities, from greatness.....
I do have lots of thoughts on what I want to do in life but why can't I really set my mind into concrete actions? Inaction is possibly what you could describe myself now. The thing is, the world rewards people who are in action. it doesn't matter whether one succeed or whether the action is stupid on hindsight. As long as one is in action, people see that as least you are trying to so something about the status quo
I was asked where do i see myself in my career in 3 years time. probably i will mention this in my next post...........
...the dark lord came, and left
Wednesday, March 14, 2018
Time waits for no one.... Met up with my intern yesterday and she remarked that time flies and she has already left her internship for already a year....
I do know that everybody's time span in this world is short and then we should always aim to live life fully. But why do I find myself stuck in mediocrity while others have seemingly progress on in their life. To me now life seem to be just clocking day in day out of work with really nothing much other than the normal meetup for meals during weekend and the cycle repeats itself in an endless loop. Yes I do know that everybody has and sets their own pace in life. There's no really fast or slow as per say.
I guess life now to me seem so stuck, so mundane and I know that it really sucks. I do want to reach out for the stars but why am I not doing it? I'm beginning to realise there bears some truth that I may be exhibiting signs of depression like what my astrologer told me.... crap!
On this day, is there anybody out there who's thoughts is of me? Happy White Day!!
...the dark lord came, and left
Saturday, March 10, 2018
It was a home gathering at my place with friends with people I was close with as well as some that I have not met for quite some time......... and then her.... Throughout the gathering we did not talk much but I find myself unknowingly glancing her at times and yea she knew that I was looking at her. People started leaving and then her. As host, I walked her to my doorstep and it seems she had something she wanted to say but was lost in her thoughts. Finally....
Her: "hmm you know I have been wanting to say this, probably its just that nothing actually happened because I thought it was too much for me to bare if I were expected to be caring for you because of what happened to your dad" (actually this reasoning sounded abit strange now that i recall about this)
Me: Pondering.... "It was never my intention to want you to feel this way. Its just......"
My naughty baby nephew had to come in to disrupt our conversation.....
Her: "Its kindda hard to continue our conversation here"
Me: "Let me send you downstairs...."
In the lift.....
Her: "I imagined that it would be ok for me to remain the way I am and just be single all the way"
Me: "I'm not really sure how things gone the way they are but especially so for the last 3-4 months of my dad's demise, my mind wasn't really thinking about any other things........"......(silence) ......
(mutual friends were inside the lift all these while)
Her: "you know I have been inching to travel"
Me: Smiling "wow me too. I'm just feeling so bored ..... hmm let's continue our conversation at some other place"...........
It's very seldom I have such vivid dreams which I can recall what went on and of her..... I'm not sure whether should I try to make sense of it. Or is this a manifestation of my own imaginary world (I have a habit of trapping myself inside them). what a way to start my weekend.....
...the dark lord came, and left
Sunday, March 4, 2018
"when both are together for a long time already, whats between is no longer love but rather companionship"
of course the underlying basis to marriage will be love, but down the road its replaced more often than not by kinship, companionship .....
So what is it that I need more love or companion? i guess to me, there's no distinction between both or i still do not understand what is the difference between both.
i guess, it feels good to have someone to have your thoughts to linger to from time to time..... to talk about the most mundane things that happen to you today........... to share your innermost thoughts ....... to rely on when you are at your vulnerable most, when you want to shut yourself to the outside world...... to wake up every morning seeing the her beside you
love, love is in fact a very simple thing but why do i always feel like over complicating it :(
...the dark lord came, and left
