Welcome to my 1st blog. I've never been into this blogging thingy before, which i decided to embark on out of fun. And this is how I am gonna kickstart it.
In case you're wondering how come i chose Jedi; any member of the knightly order in Star Wars, which was trained to defend justice and peace in the universe(www.dictionary.com), its juz
simply because i have been an avid fan of it since young and started off when i saw the 1st Star Wars movie(dun noe how long ago it was).
...don't worry! Other than sometimes fantasizing about becoming a Jedi, I'm very normal otherwise. (just abit too normal)
Sunday, July 24, 2016
Here now in Curious Pallete and would love to be blogging at a quieter spot haha.
Just had this random thought in mind to want to take stock of me as a person in terms of strengths and weaknesses and how potentially I would like to become a better person. Sounds pretty weird as to be wanting to 'document' all these down. I must have been too free these days :(
Strengths
1) Focused
If I'm able to focus my own task at hand and get into a state of what I called 'in the zone' my productivity increases by quite a fair bit. Basically, I would be so absorbed in what I'm doing that I begin to lose spatial awareness (what's going on in my surroundings) and time seems to have stop. It's not some scifi shit I'm talking about and I do get into these state fairly often and do think its quite cool haha.
2) Persistent
Once I set my task on doing something, no matter the obstacle I would just keep on moving ahead. Whether is it the decision to study Aerospace engineering, taking the plunge to take out dance as such an 'old age', learning korean; I have really stood by them although it normally takes me a long time before i decide on doing something (indecisiveness, which i will talk about later). Rarely do I ever give up on things that I have set my sights on.
Honestly saying, I'm not very sure whether I would like to define this as a good or a bad trait. There have been more than a few case where what I termed 'misguided' persistence have resulted in more pain than good for me. I tend to get too sentimental in stuff(consequence of persistency) that I take a long time to let go of certain toxic stuff in life.
3) Planner
I think its part an parcel of being an engineer and whats more, a flight test engineer. You plan and plan and plan, till you become somewhat too obsessive and you overplan. This works well for me since I hate to be caught off guard in scenarios that I did not envisioned for. I don't feel comfortable without a plan in mind and yea I think I plan pretty much most of the stuff in most of my travel trips with friends. This is just my personal opinion, I do think professions such as teachers and auditors make good planners too
Note: I wouldn't want to classify being hardworking as a trait since its simply a product of the above traits that I have mentioned. And yea Im still pondering about the topic about working hard and working smart.
4) Listener
I not sure whether I have been doing this well recently, but this is something that my best friend told me about years back when things were much more simpler I guess (I might be overthinking about this again haha).
Weakness
1) Communication
I do have a serious issue with this thus far in my life. It takes me a long time to get warm up to people. I always tend to be the more silent guy during a group meet up. Maybe because I'm never like to engage in those kind of small talk but rather engage in deep conversations. To me, cultivating a small knitted group of friends is more worthwhile compared to having to maintain skin deep level friendships with a large group of friends. My best friend keeps telling me I'm way better than what I was when he first met me. I vividly recall he was everly so critical of me. Well its really still a work in progress.
I'm not sure why, but at least the saving grace for me is I realise that I could better process my thoughts into words. Probably thats why I'm so into reading.
2) Overthinking
I procrastinate a lot in life which can often be construed as indecisiveness, but the issue is that I sometimes over think too much. I would like to think that the time is spent on analysing a certain issue from different perspectives. Well this actually can be kindda tiring.
3) Short temper
Only those who know me well enough will realise that I do have a short temper underneath that 'schoolboy' like appearance. (shameless me haha)
In a way it came about due to not being able to communicate well with others. I have recently come to the enlightenment that people generally get angry because their views are not heard or understood properly. It could also be that people are trying to enforce their views onto you which one does not accept. As such my frustration in work slowly buildup due to not being able to communicate
But one thing is for sure, there is a need that divergent viewpoints are recognised.
4) Low self esteem
I used to blame it entirely on my humble upbringing that result in me having this issue. (sometimes I still do, I'm just a human and during my schooling days I was always consumed because of it). I recognised that it all boils down to mentality. Its not helping that I'm never the optimistic guy. However if you start thinking that you are bad then the battle is already half lost.
Conclusion
Recently, I realised that I still have a long way to go in terms of becoming a more mature person. Whether is it understanding an issue in deeper depth and length, accepting that not everybody feels the same and divergent viewpoints must be recognised (take note that it does necessarily mean accepted), how not to let anger get the better of me. The one that is able to his calm and cool composure wins. Well and of course accept that being able to connect with people via active communication is important.
...the dark lord came, and left
